Archive for May, 2008

all things new

G.Jao’s idea for the next three years of my life:

Work for a few years at high-paying enginerding job. Save up $$. Send parents off to nice vacation in Hawaii. In their hotel room, leave vase of flowers with a note saying, “Dear parentals, enjoy this vacation on me! By the way, I have just changed my job — please change my email address to… “


Back from Chapter Focus Week and trying to learn what it means to trust…

pre-quantum musings

I sit at my desk with nine prayer letters in front of me… places in need of gospel, of aid, of Jesus. from brothers i’ve known since before we knew the Lord to sisters i’ve only met this semester,… despite the reluctance for some to believe in the effectiveness of STMs, I still want to believe, believe that the Lord can use them for His good, for their good,…

From Benin to Israel to Gabon to SE Asia to the inner city to Brazil to even our own coasts and nation,… the kingdom is everywhere.

On the other hand, I’m falling in love with this song — go to Used to Be. There’s also the remixx which is growing on me. It plays on repeat as I cram for quantum mechanics tonight.


A few days ago, I had a somewhat memorable dream. I was sitting in an older, wood lodge cabin,… one of the ones you’d find at a ski lodge, with a huge fireplace. All around me were CCMC (now LWEC) college kids, asking how each other were, loving on one another, catching up, talking, laughing,… I was talking to someone new on the side, asking me what this community was like, and myself answering with a smile. It was home, I replied,.. what else could it be?

Then I got a phone call. “W… are you coming? We saved a seat for you.” I get a sudden glimpse (through my dream, go figure) of cornell. of my cornellian friends sitting at a large table, with one empty seat, with c.hung on the phone asking about where I was…

Then I woke up. feeling torn.. homesick.. lonely.

All this time,… I couldn’t, can’t let go of Chicago. Of the roads driven and places eaten and people prayed over, those who took the time to disciple and grow me, the time to talk to and teach and mold,… more often than not I’d feel, I do feel a void of that here.

Yet a couple of days ago at Mini-O’s, a brother of mine got hurt playing the snake game (think the cheap java game but with people). And as he was lying on the ground, blood gushing out of his left temple, and me and several alumni fumbling with first aid kits to bandage and clean,.. he says, “haha,… w, you know why I bought that first aid kit? it’s ’cause last year, you kept telling me to bring it,.. haha…”

And at that very moment, though I didn’t know it until today, that’s when our Father, my Father who had before only shown me family in suburbia illinois,… said this is your brother. He was suddenly the timmie’s, the tommy’s, the jon’s,..

And maybe it is because the junior class and I just spent the last.. almost 12 hours working on felly dinner food & presents in my dinky little apartment,… playing the pen game with toilets and aslan. But somehow, in the midst of the delirium,.. it’s there… You’re there…

edit: bandaged little bro & myself: